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Or perhaps the title of this post should read ‘no bikes lanes, no gay marriage, no saggy pants’. That’s right, this first post in an occasional series will look at some of the stupidest ideas coming from cities across the globe in recent days. Sometimes, you need the bad ideas to show you how important the good ideas really are.
Toronto: Bike Lane Removal Going Ahead
Toronto – contender for ‘Greatest City on the Planet’ – appears to have been taken hostage by an unhinged Canadian relative of Mitt Romney who thinks removing bike lanes is a sensible thing to do. In some cities, the Mayor comes up with loads of stupid ideas and then never acts on them (*coughs*London*coughs*) but in Toronto, the removal of bike lanes on Jarvis Street is actually happening. Like right now. They’ll be gone by November 26th. Toronto resident Tomislav Svoboda, who Torontoist call ‘a physician and cycling advocate’ and I call ‘the most sensible man in Toronto’ has been arrested for protesting the change. WTF Toronto?
Paris: No to Gay Marriage
70,000 people took to the streets of Paris this weekend to protest plans to change French law so gay and lesbian couples can marry and adopt. Explaining her role in the Paris protest, Marthe Vignault said: ”A child needs a father and a mother. That’s the way it is and we can’t go against nature.” Countering her point with an equally strong argument, I am repeatedly banging my head on the table. Sur la table. Take that Marthe. Nothing says sustainable cities like inequality, right? WTF Paris?
Cocoa: Saggy Pants Law
Everyone knows that one of the most pressing issues facing cities in the 21st century is citizens who wear low-hanging trousers. Sorry, ‘pants’. Thankfully, those trailblazers in Cocoa, Florida (there’s a reason you’ve never heard of the place) are well ahead of the game and have decided to ban pants that expose underwear or skin more than three inches below the waistline. When every other city in the world enacts the law, we’ll all look to Cocoa with such gratitude for leading the way. THIS IS ALL SARCASM. Seriously though, I’m thrilled Cocoa city council has enough spare time to be talking about made-up problems like this. THAT WAS MORE SARCASM. WTF Cocoa?
Joe Peach is Editor in chief of This Big City
Image via Orin Zebest